bellinghman: (Default)
bellinghman ([personal profile] bellinghman) wrote2007-10-09 09:26 am

Oh for prayers

Sometimes, I could do with not being an atheist.

Today. my mother goes into hospital. We're all hoping it goes well, but it is a cancer that's being cut out. [livejournal.com profile] bellinghwoman and I were over there the day before yesterday doing a filial visit (showing the pictures from Japan, taking her out to the Thai Tai in Brackley), and generally acknowledging what was about to happen, but not rushing around panicking. I think that's calmed her down a lot.
ext_29896: Lilacs in grandmother's vase on my piano (candle)

[identity profile] glinda-w.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 08:55 am (UTC)(link)
GoodThoughts for her from here.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-10 08:38 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you

[identity profile] mrscosmopilite.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 08:55 am (UTC)(link)
How about positive vibes and big *hugs*

I'm sure the visit was a help to her, acknowledging that something is happening is important, often people don't talk, for many reasons, when it's cancer and that can leave the person with it feeling very isolated.
Fingers crossed all goes to pan.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:16 am (UTC)(link)
Sometimes, it's what you meant to say that matters, and that's how we'll take it. Thanks.

('goes to pan'?)

[identity profile] mrscosmopilite.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:41 am (UTC)(link)
indeed it is. Just knowing you are there for her will make a difference

(plan!- typing after too little sleep is a bad thing)

[identity profile] megabitch.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 08:59 am (UTC)(link)
*hug* definitely positive thoughts and energy being sent from here. Think of prayer as a convenient way to focus your thoughts and energies on a specific person for a period of time.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 10:13 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks.

[identity profile] furrfu.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:04 am (UTC)(link)
If you can track down the episode of Room 101 with Stephen Fry then I'd urge you to do so, and to watch it. Fry's an atheist, but he acknowledges (and explains much better than I could) that 80, 90% of our lives isn't governed by rational thinking. I think he called it spirituality, whatever - it's the thing that gives life meaning, as far as I can work out.

And, in that spir-, er, vein – best wishes. Hope all goes well.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:57 am (UTC)(link)
My god, I think you're right!

[identity profile] k425.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:08 am (UTC)(link)
If you don't mind other people's prayers, I'll say one. If you do, I'll think of you all instead (and no offence taken!)

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:14 am (UTC)(link)
Appreciated.

Since my mother is religious (one rother a CoE missionary, the other a lay preacher, that's unsurprising), I don't think she'd object, and it would be exceedingly churlish of me to do so.

[identity profile] perdita-fysh.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:28 am (UTC)(link)
Then I'll add mine to that too.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:51 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:46 am (UTC)(link)
Having noted someone else's typo, I'd better own up to this one.

'brother', not 'rother'. Bother.

[identity profile] xnamkrad.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:32 am (UTC)(link)
I know the feeling. My best wishes and thoughts are head your way.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 09:50 am (UTC)(link)
Indeed, I'm sure you do. Your 50/30/20 post was scary: having lost David Stewart roughly this time last year, I don't want any more going for a while yet. So you keep fighting, right? You owe it to your daughters (as well as your friends). Who else is going to keep the shotgun warm when they bring their boyfriends home.

And see you Friday, if you're in Maynooth that early, otherwise Saturday.

[identity profile] xnamkrad.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 03:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes the timing is not the best is it? I'll be there on Friday - not too sure what time yet.
As for my daughters (and son), I promised the eldest I'd dance at her daughters wedding, never mind her own. She ran screaming out of the room at that point.

[identity profile] beckyl.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 10:45 am (UTC)(link)
We're thinking of you.

[identity profile] bellinghman.livejournal.com 2007-10-10 08:38 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks.

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/la_marquise_de_/ 2007-10-09 10:46 am (UTC)(link)
Best wishes to you all.

[identity profile] simonb.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 11:00 am (UTC)(link)
Sending positive thoughts

[identity profile] sierra-le-oli.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 12:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Thinking of you all.
redcountess: (Default)

[personal profile] redcountess 2007-10-09 05:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Thinking good thoughts for your mother.

[identity profile] djelibeybi.livejournal.com 2007-10-09 05:49 pm (UTC)(link)
You are in our thoughts.

[identity profile] sshi.livejournal.com 2007-10-10 06:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Only read this now, but my best wishes to both your mother and yourself. I've been there with both parents and I'll be thinking of you all.

[identity profile] hypatia.livejournal.com 2007-10-14 03:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Slow catching up with LJ (hope you get comments mailed :)) but I'm echoing the comments of others. Thoughts, prayers or whatever helps are yours.

I think you did exactly the right thing - just 'being there' without making a fuss about it is what really matters most of the time. If you had cancelled plans to sit around and wait for the worst it would likely have had a negative effect on her and morale is important facing serious illness. She knows you love her and want to support her and that is what really helps until the point at which something more practical is needed.